Happiness – everyone is striving to achieve it. Television, peers and books are all providing us with happiness formulas and means to reach this state of bliss.
One question remains unanswered, however. Is happiness a matter of choice or does it depend heavily on external circumstances. Each single person in the world wishes to be happy. Some achieve it, others are unable to. It might be a bit more difficult to achieve happiness, even if formulas claim that is all about your state of mind. It turns out that another factor could be playing a major role.
How often have you been told to be ‘happy’ and to look at the world in a positive way? Though it sounds very easy, this state may be difficult to achieve. Studies show that happiness is not entirely a matter of personal choices.
Sonia Lyubomirsky is a psychology professor from the University of California. She recently published a book about happiness and the factors that it is dependent on. According to Lyubomirski, 50 percent of a person’s happiness level is genetically coded. About 10 percent of the happiness level is connected to circumstances and 40 percent come from thoughts, behavior and attitude towards life.
The 50 percent coming from genetics is something that will remain unchanged throughout life. A person could be able to control circumstances and predisposition. Even if the individual has the strongest of will, this positive outlook may have difficulties outweighing the genetics.
Lyubomirsky’s study is revolutionary, since it shows that uncontrollable factors interfere with the manner in which a person experiences happiness. Logically, some people will be able to become happier than others because of the genetically coded happiness level.
These discrepancies make it difficult for people to understand each other. If you are a happy and content person, you will be unable to walk in the shoes of someone who believes that the glass is always half-empty.
When it comes to a marriage or a relationship, the situation becomes even more complicated. If one of the people is genetically prone to be happier, that person will be unable to understand a partner who is burdened by genetic heritage.
Though the advice is a very important one, few people are capable of accepting others as they are. The study that Lyubomirsky carried out once again confirms that often people might be unable to control all aspects of their life.
Yes, we do have control over 50 percent of our happiness level. Still, everyone has to recognize and accept the fact that some individuals could be unable to be as happy as everyone else. It could be quite complex to change living circumstances and if an individual feels dissatisfied at home and in life, that individual will probably have even more difficulty staying happy.
If you are in a relationship and you love your partner, you should certainly strive to make that other person happy. Understand that each person is a unique individual, having unique sentiments and understandings of life. Instead of putting effort into changing that person, put effort into your mutual happiness. Who knows, you might be able to overcome the 50 percent coming from genetics.